Crazy about surfing. I want bigger and bigger and bigger waves. I get punished by premenstrual swells just for the fun of it and so my friends can laugh. I frequently remove my chest hair with a lighter and paraffin. When I go somewhere really cold I use an 8mm diving suit with about as much flexibility as a lead pipe. I don't like surfing alone because every friends that joins me reduces MY chance of being the one to get a sharkbite. I broke my first board (Nirvana 6'8'' fixed fin squashtail) on the Durban New Pier in 8 foot surf because I didn't know how to duckdive or follow riptides properly. I tried surfing 10 ft waves at Bay of Plenty with a 6'1'' Clayton just so that I could amuse my friends. I hate groms that are better than me that steal waves and don't get out of the way when I drop in (anyone under 25 is a grom as far as I'm concerned). I envy the 3 ft groms that can rip it in 2 ft surf. I only get to surf when my dominating girlfriend lets me. I surf because your mom thinks I look sexy in boardshorts. The most perfect day I ever had was the 2010 Virginia Air Show when I surfed (the spot I can't name) and it felt like being in a movie. I can't do much in the way of tricks but it's okay because chicks still dig it when I hold my board like (this). Iâ€™m old enough now that I don't care how big the wave I'm dropping into is. I canâ€™t claim to be a charger and it will take much practice to get there. Much respect to those who do no matter how theyâ€™re doing it. The only thing to look forward to at the end of a big morning session is a day job, so anything that goes wrong is better than what will happen every day at work. No one else in the whole world, except surfers, understands surfing, and no one else cares. MSW won't let me put any nude pictures of myself here, otherwise I would be happy to. I write on MSW when my girlfriend unties my handcuffs. I listen to white girl rap when I steal her lingeree and wear it.